One of the most famous actresses, Marilyn Monroe, committed suicide, and psychoanalysts have been brooding on the reason why. She was one of the beautiful women ever, one of the most successful. Even the President of America Kennedy, was in love with her, and she had thousands of lovers. One cannot think of what more you can have. She had everything.
But she was public and she knew it. Even in her love chamber when President Kennedy was there, she addressed him as Mr. President – as if she was making love not to a man, but to an institution.
She was an institution. By and by she came aware that she had nothing private. Once somebody asked here – she had just posed for a nude calendar and somebody asked, “Did you have anything on while you posed for the nude calendar?” She said, “Yes, I had something on. The radio.”
Exposed, nude, no private self. My feeling is that she committed suicide because that was the only thing left she could have done privately. Everything was public, that was the only thing left she could do on her own, alone, something absolutely intimate and secret. Public figures are always tempted towards suicide because only through suicide can they have a glimpse of who they are.
All that is beautiful is inner, and the inner means privacy. Have you watched women making love? They always close their eyes. They know something. In darkness, everything else disappears because you cannot see. Only you and the senses are there. That´s why, in all good restaurants, light is avoided; sharp light is avoided. They are candle-lit. Whenever a restaurant is candle-lit, taste is deeper: you eat well and you taste more. The fragrance surrounds you. If there is very bright light the taste is no longer there. The eyes make everything public.
Go in so that your coming out becomes richer and is not impoverished. And always remember that whenever you feel exhausted, the source of energy is within. Close your eyes and go in. Make outer relationships; of course there are bound to be outer C – you move in the world, business relationships will be there – but they should not be all. They have their part to play, but there must be something absolutely secret and private, something that you can call your own. Make inner relationships also.
That is what Marilyn Monroe lacked. She was a public woman – successful, yet completely a failure. She was at the top of her success and fame when she committed suicide. She had everything to live for; you cannot conceive of more fame, more success, more charisma, more beauty, more health. Everything was there, nothing could be improved upon, and still something was lacking. The inside, the within, was empty.
Osho
Come follow to You, Vol. 1
